Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Remember me?

Hey there! 
Sorry I have been so M.I.A. lately! I have just been so busy with the holidays and what not. My family throws a big New Years party every year, and we have been going crazy with cleaning the house to get it all ready for the 40+ Mexicans that will be spending the night in a few days ;D I hope everyones' Christmas was lovely! Mine was! I talked to Ryan on Skype for hours (which was all I wanted from him for Christmas)! It was amazing! He had a flight, on Christmas, so I felt bad that he didn't get to experience the traditions this year. I know he was a bit homesick :/ I gave him his gifts before he left for deployment, but I still wish he could have had something to open on the 25th. Christmas morning, I talked to Ryan for a little bit and then headed over to his dad's house for breakfast. That was actually REALLY nice.

I was slightly worried, because I am not as close with his father as I am with his mother. I had a great time though! I bought them toys for their fantastic dogs, Earl and Stella, and a cute jar of chocolate truffles :D They gave three sets of adorable pajamas, and his stepmom made me the cutest blanket! I should take a picture of it to show you guys, but I'm too tired to get up and turn the light on >.< After I came home, I went to my grandma's house and talked to Ryan for a few  more hours before he had to go to sleep. The next morning, I was all set to go out to breakfast with Ryan's mom! I talked to Ryan while I was getting ready, and then Cindy came and picked me up around 10am. She is the only woman who can get me to drink at 10 in the morning! Orange juice with champagne! YUM<3333 After a very nice breakfast, Cindy (who bought me Despicable Me on DVD! And LOVED her Airbear! :D) dropped me off at my house around noon.... and what did I find when I turned the corner towards my room?!? 
My lovely boyfriend had my sister saran wrap my gifts to my door -_- hahahaha I love that weirdo! He bought me my Steelers jersey, and two adorable Obey shirts! Sadly, I had just bought one of those shirts myself! So he said I could trade it in for a pair of boots >.<
I told him not to get me anything! 

I love my Airman(: Things between Ryan and I have been so great. He contacts me as often as he can, and it is more than I ever dreamed of! I am worried though, because he might get sent to the deid due to bad weather at the current base he is at :( Not all of the dorms there have internet, and the ones that do have completely crappy connections! He said that the worst possible case is that we won't get to talk for the remainder of his deployment!!!!! He is only supposed to be there for a week, but the weather isn't showing any signs of changing :( No contact for 2 months?!!?!!!!! That is like basic all over again, except this time NO LETTERS. I am willing the weather to change so we can keep on with these lovely Skype chats (:

He better shave off that baby mustache before he comes home! ;D

On to something more positive though, mine and Ryan's anniversary is coming up on Tuesday the 4th :D I might not be able to talk to him though :( BUT! Because he wasn't sure if we would be able to talk (because he might have diverted by then) he decided to tell me what my gift was :D When he goes back to Washington at the end of his deployment, he is going to fly me up there to spend a few days with him, and then the two of us are going to fly back to California together for his week long leave :D!!!!!!!!!! I am so excited! He told me to just be ready to fly by the 1st of March ;D I honestly cannot wait. He wouldn't let me show him what I bought him for our anniversary and his birthday though! That brat ;D I guess that just means I get to continue adding to his box then ;D I love spoiling my man. 

Well, that is all for now! I'll do my best to update when I get breaks in between these cleaning crazes! Be safe everyone!

I love you baby

Thursday, December 23, 2010

THAT'S IT!!!!!!! >:(

I am so tired of feeling this way. It is time to make some changes and starting tomorrow, it is SO on. I am going to lose weight. My goal is 15 pounds gone by the time Ryan comes home in March. I don't think I am terribly unhealthy, but I know I can be better. When I was younger, I was really overweight, and then I lost 45 pounds. That was about 6 years ago now, and since then I've probably gained 5lbs.... so at least I haven't gained it back or anything. I HAVEN'T LOST ANY EITHER THOUGH!!!!!!!!! 

It also doesn't help that my boyfriend has the ultimate freak metabolism! Seriously, that boy literally CAN'T gain weight -_- PLUS! He eats like a total cow. I gain weight just LOOKING at him eat. He has a legitimate six-pack! And other strategically placed muscles! I can't feel like this while my man looks like THAT.... So officially, TOMORROW.. I will turn over a new leaf (cliche) and I will start being more active and eating healthy. Now... I haven't looked at a scale in about 5 years (when I go to the doctors I ask them not to put it on my paper or tell me, they only tell me if I've gained or lost :X) so I don't know how I will keep track of this, but I'm sure it will show if I feel it. Oh, and I am well aware that I will NEVER look like those lovely Victoria's Secret models, but I want to feel sexy when I wear all of those things that they get PAID to wear -_- (Oh, and Adriana Lima.. the one in the middle... she's my wife<3) All I need is a push and a little will power. I have 67 days to make MYSELF happy. Let's see if I can do this. 

Anyway. back to my Airman! Christmas morning Ryan has a flight :( So no Skype till later that night or maybe early the 26th. On the 25th I am going to breakfast at his Dad's house though so that should be fun. I already know they are going to ask me 365746957143718173543million questions about Ryan :X I always get so nervous around them. Then, on the 26th I am going to brunch with his momma!(: IT IS GOING TO BE SO HARD TO EAT WELL! haha But I can do it. 

I am sad though :( Another holiday without my man. I gave him his present before he left for deployment, but it breaks my heart knowing he won't actually have anything ON Christmas from me. I am sending him a box of goodies soon though in honor of our anniversary and his birthday(:

Day 3- My Parents

I know you are hurt with me, and even though I don't agree... know that I understand. I love you, and I appreciate everything you have done for me... but it is time to let me do what I must. You raised a good girl, a girl who shouldn't have to feel guilty about decisions that have made her unbelievably happy. I hope one day you can understand.

Wish me luck!

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Shopping for my Airman's mom(:

My boyfriend's mom.... 

is by far one of the most incredible women that I have ever had the pleasure of knowing. I could only hope to be half the woman she is when I reach the end of the road(: When Ryan and I weren't on speaking terms, not only did it break my heart that I lost my best friend, but it also thoroughly sucked that I no longer had his mother to talk to.

I don't open up to people easily. I am the girl who keeps everything to herself until it builds up to the point of irrational overflow. I also don't have the best relationship with my mother. I suppose it has gotten better over the years, but still no where near what a mother/daughter relationship should be...... and it is a constant source of hurt for me. So when Cindy allowed me to open up to her, a whole river of emotions and words came pouring out. She was drowning in them, poor woman haha(: She never makes me feel like a burden though, and is always there when I need her. Whether it concerns things at home, myself,  my mom, or even Ryan... she is always there to listen. She gives the best advice, and even makes sure to open up a little to me as well, which means so much. People think that it is weird that I have been to bars, clubs, and one on one dinners with his mother, but I see nothing weird about spending time with this wonderful woman.

BUT!!!!! What do I get her for Christmas?! What do I get my boyfriend's ULTIMATE best friend (he is such a momma's boy >.<) What do I get the woman that raised the amazing man who has stole my heart?!? I struggled for weeks with ideas! With Christmas only 3 days away, I was rushing around everywhere today still trying to find a gift for my own mom. In the end, my sister and I decided to make my mom a little firefighter bear at the Build-A-Bear Workshop (my father has been a firefighter/paramedic for the past 20 years :) AND THEN I SAW IT! The PERFECT gift for Ryan's mom!!!!!
 and here it is!

A little Air Force bear!!!!!!! I saw the outfit and fell in love! I want one for myself! haha :D For those of you that don't know, those are the "blues" that many Airmen wear! Ryan looks so handsome in his, but he absolutely HATES wearing them haha He says they are uncomfortable, and hard to maintain. Either way this little bear was in for the win!!!!!! 

If you have never been to a Build-A-Bear Workshop, let me explain how it works..... 
  1. First, you pick out your animal. They have everything from teddy bears, to wild animals, to Hello Kitty characters(:
  2. Then you head over to the stuffing area, where a worker brings your animal of choice to life. (Which looks kind of disturbing to me! :X)
  3. The worker asks you who the "furry friend" is for, and then asks you to pick out a heart to put inside your new friend
  4. Once you pick out the heart, you have to rub it on your cheek for good luck, rub it on your heart for love, and kiss it for a life of happiness. (I'm not making this up. They actually make you do this :X) 
  5. Finally, they make you close your eyes and make a wish before they actually sew the heart inside your friend!
  6. THEN... you have to give your friend a "bath" (literally, they have a bath tub and brushes and whatnot. No real water though :)
  7. FINALLY! You are allowed to pick out an outfit for your friend. THEY HAVE EVERYTHING! I mean EVERYTHING. Football teams, baseball teams, military, careers, disney characters, movie characters... EVERYTHING
  8. The last step before you continue on to paying for your friend is to make him/her a birth certificate, where you give your friend a name!
I named him "Airbear" and now he is sitting comfortably in my room, waiting for his rightful owner(: I am having brunch with Cindy the day after Christmas hopefully, and I can't wait to give him to her! 

Here is a picture of "Itttle Bernie" and "Airbear" <3

Anyway, continuing on with this 30 day thing!

Day 2- Your Crush

HA! Crush?! What I currently feel romantically is nowhere NEAR a "crush." I haven't had a "crush" since the 9th grade, so no one gets a letter today! haha (:

Ok, that is all for the night! I am hoping to talk to Ryan in an hour or two (:
Night everyone!

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Day 1

So, I've decided to take part in this daily letter blog thing. Today has been so BLAH for me, so this seemed like a quick distraction (: 

Day 1 — Your Best Friend(s)
Day 2 — Your Crush
Day 3 — Your parents
Day 4 — Your sibling (or closest relative)
Day 5 — Your dreams
Day 6 — A stranger
Day 7 — Your Ex-boyfriend/girlfriend/love/crush
Day 8 — Your favorite internet friend
Day 9 — Someone you wish you could meet
Day 10 — Someone you don’t talk to as much as you’d like to
Day 11 — A Deceased person you wish you could talk to
Day 12 — The person you hate most/caused you a lot of pain
Day 13 — Someone you wish could forgive you
Day 14 — Someone you’ve drifted away from
Day 15 — The person you miss the most
Day 16 — Someone that’s not in your state/country
Day 17 — Someone from your childhood
Day 18 — The person that you wish you could be
Day 19 — Someone that pesters your mind—good or bad
Day 20 — The one that broke your heart the hardest
Day 21 — Someone you judged by their first impression
Day 22 — Someone you want to give a second chance to
Day 23 — The last person you kissed
Day 24 — The person that gave you your favorite memory
Day 25 — The person you know that is going through the worst of times
Day 26 — The last person you made a pinky promise to
Day 27 — The friendliest person you knew for only one day
Day 28 — Someone that changed your life
Day 29 — The person that you want tell everything to, but too afraid to
Day 30 — Your reflection in the mirror

Day 1- My Best Friend
I have never really had a "best friend." I guess I am just not the "best friend" kind of girl. As of now though, the three people I trust the most are Ryan, my sister, and my friend Mikayla (who is still trying to get her blog up and running, but you should check it out and encourage her :X She is a nutcase! 
Ryan- I love you with everything I am. Thank you for being there for me and pushing me. I love that I can be myself around you, and you accept me, no matter what ridiculousness I may throw at you (: You are my world. 
Marissa- I know we argue, and I know sometimes it may seem like I want to throw a brick at you(: but I love you, and when we aren't arguing... we have the BEST time. You know all of my secrets(:
Mikayla- You caught me off guard! You came out of nowhere, and I feel like I've known you forever! No matter what we do, whether it is sitting on my bed being macbook nerds, or shopping for underwear that we both know we don't need... I am so content when in your company(: 

Saw this and could not stop laughing haha

I did not get to talk to Ryan today :( He had a night flight, and got back very very late. I miss his him dammit! haha ok that is my little rant for the day >.<

Still no address from that butt head either! He is lagging on getting it for me. I don't understand why though, this box I am sending him for our anniversary/his birthday is LEGIT :D When I finally put it all together, I will take pictures of all of the stuff he is getting and share it with all of you on here ^_^
ok that is all for now.!

Monday, December 20, 2010

The Importance of Being Thoughtful

I have only had a blog for a few days, but I am just absolutely amazed at how sweet everyone is. How eager you all are to read each other's stories, and how open you are with your own. It is wonderful to say the least(:

I have received more comments than I thought I would in 3 posts, and so many lovely emails from many of you! Honestly, besides hearing from Ryan, any feedback I get is the highlight of my day.

It feels great knowing that I can talk about my feelings concerning my relationship, and not feel bad about it. I am  only one of two out of my group of friends that is in a serious relationship, and by far the only one in a long-distance MILITARY one. I feel awkward sharing my feelings with them, only because I know they do not really understand. It doesn't hurt my feelings, and I know they love me and want to be there for me as much as possible... it just doesn't sit right.

Here though, a majority of you are either in the same situation I am, will be, or have been previously. The support system is such a beautiful thing, and I am so glad that I was introduced to this.

I didn't get to video chat with Ryan this morning because I was at work, but we did talk on AIM thanks to my droid phone. Best purchase EVER. He was being so cute. Telling me he loved me and that he was sorry we couldn't Skype but that he couldn't wait to see and talk to me the next morning. Then he finally sent me some new pictures of himself with a little tag that read "for you baby :]"

AHH!!!! When he is adorable like that it just makes me miss him more! :/
He looked so handsome.

Well, for the night I thought I'd share some quotes I found. The last one is by far my favorite<3 Enjoy!

"whatever souls are made of, him and mine are the same"

"There's a reason why two people
come together and stay together;
they both give each other something 
no one else can."

Love is patient, love is kind. It 
does not envy, it does not boast, 
it is not proud. It is not rude, it is 
not self-seeking, it is not easily 
angered, it keeps no record of 
wrongs. Love does not delight in 
evil but rejoices with the truth. It 
always protects, always trusts, 
always hopes, always perseveres

"Love isn't him calming you down when you yell.
It's him yelling, just as loud, just as hard, right back at you, right in your face to wake you up and keep you grounded.
It isn't him bringing you roses everyday or cute things that make your relationship appear more presentable.
It's after a long fight, that drains the life and bones out of both of you, and yet him showing up at your door the next morning anyway.
It's not him saying all the right things or knowing exactly how to handle you. It's not him caressing your hair and telling you everything is going to be alright.
It's him standing there, admitting he's just as scared as you are."

"The night we talked; We talked about life, about our times together. Maybe we aren't the same two kids we once were, but some things never change. Some things last & even though I didn't know what was going to happen to us or where we were going, I just knew I couldn't let you out of my life."

“Long-term relationships- the ones that matter- are all about weathering the peaks and valleys”

"You may not be her first, her last, or her only. She loved before she may love again. But if she loves you now, what else matters? She's not perfect - you aren't either, and the two of you may never be perfect together but if she can make you laugh, cause you to think twice, and admit to being human and making mistakes, hold onto her and give her the most you can. She may not be thinking about you every second of the day, but she will give you a part of her that she knows you can break - her heart. So don't hurt her, don't change her, don't analyze and don't expect more than she can give. Smile when she makes you happy, let her know when she makes you mad, and miss her when she's not there."

(I'm considering getting this one as a tattoo :X)
"No one else will have me like you do.
No one else will have me, only you."

"Contrary to what the cynics say, 
distance is not for the fearful. It's 
for the bold. It's for those willing 
to spend a lot of time alone in 
exchange for a little time with the
one they love. It's for those knowing 
a good thing when they see it. Even 
if they don't see it nearly enough."


Sunday, December 19, 2010

Skype is my new best friend (:

So, I am skyping Ryan right now (that sounds so weird) and I was able to get some adorable snap shots of him while we were talking, and I just thought I'd share them >.<

Ok, now he fell asleep on me. I don't blame him, it is around 2am over there. I don't want to hang up though! There is something comforting about it. Plus, he is so damn cute (: I did take some funny snap shots though!

So peaceful :P<3

My sister, her ugly dog and I in the corner!

and now just the ugly dog hahaha!

Ok that is all for now(: 

He has another flight tomorrow night (tonight for him) so I hope everything goes well (:

Saturday, December 18, 2010

Just Lovely My Dear

Ryan has his first flight tomorrow (well...technically today for him) and I am excited for him. I believe it is the last time he flies with an instructor. Be safe babe.

So I promised I'd write about my man, so here it goes (:
(WARNING: This is REALLY long :X)

I met Ryan in late 2005. He was actually my younger sister's really close friend, so I knew he existed, I had just never met him. One day, my mother was driving my sister and I home from some sort of practice most likely, and my sister noticed Ryan walking along the side of the road. Of course, my mother pulled over and asked him if he needed a ride home, and that little redhead jumped right in.

I instantly got a taste of his sarcasm, and the whole ride home we argued and poked fun at each other. After that, our interactions became more frequent, and always occurred in a group. He was the life of the party every single time(:

Eventually, I developed a sense of self around him. I wanted to look nice when he came over. I wanted to be witty when we spoke. I wanted him to want to be around me. AND HE DID ;D Eventually, he became more MY friend, than my sister's and we no longer really needed to hang out in a group. The two of us were completely content as a pair. Although, the first time he held my hand took place on a group movie outing. The movie was crappy, but I had a GREAT time(: His hand was the epitome of sweaty ;)

We were inseparable. With one, came the other. This was hard for my parents, especially my father. I come from a very traditional hispanic family, and my parents were already having trouble dealing with a few other aspects of my life. They wanted me to stay inside my room, study, and watch the Disney channel. Needless to say, as things became worse for me at home, and with myself.... things began sliding downhill with Ryan.

I will be honest, there are no excuses for the way things panned out between us. Yes, I was young, but I cared for him way too much in order to allow what happened to happen. I wish I would have done so many things differently. High school was a really rough time for me, but that was one casualty I could have done without. Eventually, we stopped talking. That was tough. I loved his family, especially his mother. I loved him. The few times we tried to pick it back up as friends were awkward for both of us, and soon we just stopped trying.

By the time the later part of my senior year rolled around we were back on speaking terms. We were nowhere near as close as we were before, but a majority of the resentment had faded. I was having a rough time dealing with a few things that I experienced in the past year, and he was still so easy to talk to... and I missed him. That was a weird time. We had both been seeing other people, and jealousy was not a foreign feeling for either of us.

Then graduation  time arrived, and our interactions occurred  few and far between. I became involved in what would become a 2 year relationship from hell, and I know he dated a few girls (I don't really know too much about his past girlfriends, and I don't want to :P) I believe that from the beginning of 2008 to the middle of 2009, we only spoke a handful of times over text message. I can't say that our time apart was exactly a bad thing though... we both matured in necessary ways.

My then relationship was probably one of the most unhealthy things that I have ever experienced. I only saw what I wanted to see, and ignored every single warning sign imaginable... and I paid for it. I am not proud of that part of my life, and I would be lying if I said that the experience didn't change me.... I still don't know if it was for the better or worse. Throughout that entire time though... I missed Ryan.

My sister still spoke to him, and would tell me things about him every once in awhile. Like the time he wore a zebra vest to a dance :P, the time he bought a motorcycle, the time he got in a motorcycle accident -_-, the time he got in a motorcycle accident AGAIN, and ultimately.. when he made the decision to join the Air Force. In mid 2009, Ryan began texting me asking if I wanted to get a cup of coffee or lunch some time. I was still with my boyfriend at the time, and things were unhealthier than ever. Yet, I gave every excuse in the book as to why I could not go get coffee. I didn't know what it was.

Finally, I woke up. I ended things with my boyfriend in late July of 2009. I cried for at least 2 days. Not sad tears mind you....I COULD BREATHE. I was so happy. I went out, I had fun, I spoiled myself, my grades went back up. Things were GREAT.... and then Ryan contacted me again. By that time it was mid August, and I had run out of excuses ;) I agreed to meet him at McDonalds after my night class. I HATE MCDONALDS. I'm talking LOATHE. Yet there I went, and I made my sister go with me. That had to have been one of the most awkward things I have ever done. I was so nervous when he pulled up next to us on his BRIGHT yellow street bike (which I also loathe by the way -_-) and we then proceeded to go inside, not look at each other, and not sit next to each other. Weirdos right? haha(:

After that "lovely" late night snack, we began texting quite often. I still didn't want to hang out with him much though. Why would I hang out with someone that was just going to leave in 3 months?! I didn't want to do that to myself. I REFUSED to do that to myself. So what did I do? I went to an Angels baseball playoff game with him -_- (The more you follow my blog, the more you will find out that I have NO will power) I had an amazing time. After the first hour, my nerves completely disappeared. It was just like old times. By the time we arrived back at his place, I wanted a hug... and the bastard didn't want to give me one! He shook his head and just stared at me. So I got out of the car, walked over to him, hugged him really hard, stomped back to my car, and sped away.

By that time, I knew he had two more months before he left...... I wasn't having ANY of it. I mean yeah.. I agreed to hang out with him on several occasions, and yeah I was talking to him till I fell asleep most nights but whatever :P I didn't want it. I did such a good job of showing it too. I mean.. he took me to Universal Studios, and I only held his hand 80% of the time O_o

One night, I ditched class to go to dinner with him :X I know I know terrible me. He took me to eat sushi, (we are both OBSESSED) and then we went about town searching for a too tight Spiderman costume for him to wear on Halloween (a holiday that was RAPIDLY approaching). After I convinced him that he could NOT fit into a child's medium -_- , we both realized that we did not want to go home yet. So he offered to take me to the movies. We decided on Where the Wild Things Are, something I had been wanting to see. I loved the movie, although I must say it was a rather disturbing child's film. It was late by the time our movie let out, and we ended up sitting in the car at his mom's apartment parking lot cracking jokes and telling secrets (haha LAME) Then, he just bent over and kissed me. I don't know if it was to shut me up because I was nervous or what, but it was amazing. I missed him. I was going to miss him so much.

That night, I was so unbelievably mad at myself. I didn't want those feelings. I distanced myself, and I know he noticed because he pulled back a little as well. We still hung out, but in groups. LARGE groups. I was such a coward.... but I just wanted to protect myself. We had talked about him joining a few times, but I did my best to avoid the topic. I wanted nothing to do with it.

October 30th rolled around. He was leaving in 3 days for basic. I wanted nothing to do with it. My parents were out of town that weekend, and my cousin and I agreed that we would throw two Halloween parties. The first being at her house, and the second being at mine on Halloween night. Obviously he was invited, and of course I had to be deathly ill. (Seriously, I lost 10 pounds in 2 weeks)
Despite my impending doom though, we went ahead with the parties. Of course, being of sound mind, I medicated myself and proceeded to feel that a little bit of alcohol was a good idea O_o ... It was not. Both nights I threw up the entire night, and Ryan sat with me the entire time. Holding my hair and wetting towels to put on my forehead. We fell asleep one night squished into a little corner of the living room couch, and the next on some floor cushions(:

The next morning he stayed with me until my family was supposed to arrive home, kissed me on the forehead, and left. I agreed that I would go shopping with him for last minute essentials the following morning, but by the time that rolled around, I was barely able to get out of bed. So what did he do? He brought me a snow cone. We sat on my front porch for a little bit. I suppose it didn't really hit me that this would be the last time I would see him in person for quite awhile.

He had a good bye dinner that he was the star of, and thus, he kissed me on the cheek and left.

I was sad. So ridiculously sad.
"Sad" is such a lame word, but in every sense of the word. I was SAD.
He text me all the way up to his arrival at the airport.
He called me before his flight boarded.
He told me he loved me.
I told him I loved him.
He told me that he would write to me.
I told him I would write back.

and that was it.

Just before he had to shut off his phone, he sent me one last text though.
"Would you ever consider being with me?"

and what did I say?
"No. No, because you deserve better."

The next two weeks were AWFUL. I mean AWFUL. Not only was I sick, but I missed him in a way that I have NEVER missed anyone before. Seriously, I did not know that I was capable of such a degree of longing. But there I was. Writing a letter a day, with no where to send it. I poured my heart out in those letters. I told him how angry I was that he left. How much I almost wished we had not started talking again....

At the end of those awful two weeks, one of his cousins contacted me on facebook, saying that Cindy, Ryan's mom, wanted her to give me his address so that I could write to him.

FINALLY. I could send my mini-novel(:
No joke, it was almost too heavy to put in a regular envelope >.<
But there was a problem... did I want to?
I knew what was happening.
I re-read my NINE page typed letter, and I knew.
I had really stepped in it this time.

A few days after I sent it, I received a letter from him! He hadn't received my letter yet, but he was thinking about me.. and that was all I cared about.
The letter did break my heart though.
He seemed so sad, and there was nothing I could do.

We went on like that for 2 months. I wrote to him every day, and then I would mail the result by the end of the week. He wrote me as often as he could, and never before in my life have I ever looked forward to checking the mail as much as I did then.

I became more and more comfortable with each letter, and it was obvious that he did as well. He was quite literally winning me over with words. And if he couldn't tell that I was falling for him all over again... well then he is not as smart as he thinks he is ;)

I started calling him "babe" and "bbbyyy" in my letters (like leaving out the "a" in "baby" would make me innocent!) And he was just as affectionate.

I believe that the entire time he was in basic, I got three phone calls from him. The longest being 2 minutes long. It was so painful, and after the first phone call I cried like a baby. WHAT WAS WRONG WITH ME?!!?!?! What happened to the girl who wasn't going to let herself anymore?!

She was gone. He had me. He still has me. He will ALWAYS have me(:
He graduated from basic in early January 2010, and we made our relationship official on January 4th.

Don't get me wrong. Our second time around hasn't exactly been a walk in the park.
Getting used to the long-distance aspect was a real challenge for both of us, and it took us a long time to find a common ground in terms of how we want to handle it. But we are both trying the best that we know how, and it is entirely worth it.

He is entirely worth it.

Our anniversary is approaching really fast, and I hope he gives in and gives me an address so that I can send him a box full of goodies.
Hmmm.... I can't wait until March!
I love you babe(:
And I am so proud of you<3


First off, I would just like to say thank you  to everyone that commented on my first post, and to those who started following! I will do my best to post often, and I look forward to following all of your blogs (:

Also! Kelsey and Michel! You are so busted! I told Ryan that I started a blog and his exact words were.... "Michel and Kelsey sucked you into it didn't they?! What, are you guys going to be the new desperate housewives or what?!" haha :X :D

This morning I got a lovely surprise! My boyfriend instant messaged me, and asked if we could skype before I had to go to work. Of course I jumped right on, and we talked for two hours! He really loved watching me get ready for work :P haha He is an entire 14 hours ahead of me, so my 8am was his 11pm. He looked so tired, but kept refusing to go to sleep(: He also claimed to be a little bit buzzed because they went to a "magic" show with other crew members. He looked so handsome in his PT gear. Anyway, he instant messaged me again not too long ago and said that he was about to go play basketball with Kelsey's boyfriend, Caleb. Apparently, Caleb is pretty legit so I expect that Ryan is getting completely OWNED by him right now haha.

I'm going to head off now, I'm going to wake up early for another skype session.  Next post will most likely be about Ryan and how we met and such (: I can talk about him 24/7... gross, huh? ;D

Ryan's favorite Disney movie(:

My favorite Disney movie :D!!!!

Thursday, December 16, 2010

Ready Set Go

Hey you, my name is Rebecca.
No one calls me that though, and I prefer it that way. It makes me feel like I'm either in trouble or I should be running around on a farm somewhere. So, Becca will do just fine(: I am 21 years old, and about 11 months away from finishing school! Ultimately I would love to be an ORN, but for now I am getting my Associates in Occupational Science and my surgical technologist certification. The program I am in is an accelerated one though, which means I have surrendered about 90% of my social life to little ol' ACC. It will be worth it in the end though(:

I have been a Petco employee for over 3 years now, and I am MORE than over it. Don't get me wrong, they have been great when it comes to working with my school schedule, and I love animals. I just want something more. I am not going to be the person shaving your dog and pulling their ear hair for the rest of my life. (No offense to anyone who does that! It's just not for me ^_^)

I have 5 dogs, 1 mini lop bunny, and 1 fish! I am a complete animal person! I trust them more than I trust most people >.< When I finally venture from the nest, I would LOVE to own a parrot, Great Dane, French Bulldog, and an Irish Wolfhound :D!!!! I will most likely end up adopting though, because those fricken shelter commercials with the depressing songs playing in the background make me want to cry every time.

So, why become a blogger you ask? (or not) Well, I have always loved writing. I love books. I love words. Books were quite literally my best friend when I was younger.... I haven't always been the best with people :X Anyway, I always felt that I was better expressing myself on paper. Or in this case, via an internet web page.

My love for anything word related isn't the sole reason for my new lease on a blogger's lifestyle though. I have a boyfriend. An absolutely amazing boyfriend named Ryan, whom I love from head to toe. A boyfriend who I would do anything for. A boyfriend who is, by far, my best friend. All that being said, my best friend is a boom operator for the United States Air Force. THAT being said, my best friend is also stationed in Spokane, Washington; while I remain in Alta Loma, California.

I never was really a fan or a believer of long-distance relationships. I felt that they had no purpose. I felt that they were a flat out WASTE OF TIME. Obviously, I've changed my mind(: Never before have I experienced anything so challenging, and yet so worthwhile. I'll get more into my airman and our relationship on a future post though(:

Back to my reason for joining! Recently, (and by "recently" I mean 2 days ago) Ryan left for his first deployment. Now, we didn't talk to each other all day every day, and we were already miles away in the first place.... but him being 2 states away is a completely different from being OCEANS away. I suppose I have to get used to it though, this being the first of many deployments he will most likely take part in.

Moving on.... Ryan was deployed with his friend Caleb, and it was Caleb's lovely girlfriend Kelsey that made me consider starting a blog. She said it really helped her deal with everything, and seeing that before meeting her and Michel (another airman's lovely significant other) I had no one to talk to really that could understand the kinds of issues and feelings that come with this lifestyle, so I figured I'd give it a try!

Well, that's all for now! I have to get ready to go out to a celebratory dinner in honor of me dominating all of my final exams ;D